By not going through a car wash your doing the paintwork a favour anyway😆. In addition to marring the paint a bit each time, these automatic car washes never wash wheels inside the barrels, door shuts, rubber seals etc etc, and seldom if at all dry the car leaving water spots even if they add rinse additives to the water.
I appreciate not everyone has the driveway or physical ability to wash their own car and in those circumstances your choices are limited. Personally I would leave it dirty for longer and just take it to a local detailing company to wash it properly which is typical £15-20 depending on what’s done.
Ok, I think this is the definitive answer having just checked on my car (but please verify with your own car..!)
Car locked and remote key in range - gesture works
Car locked and key not in range - obviously you can gesture all you like it'll never open
Car running and remote key in the car - gesture doesn't work (makes sense, this is like being stopped at traffic lights when you don't particularly want people opening the boot)
Car running and remote key in range eg. in your pocket and you've got out - gesture works